It’s kinda a funny story
by Genie101
Summary: We all know ever famous jokester two bit ,but what happens when he is barely seventeen and a prank of his goes terribly wrong. Set before he ever meets any of the gang. Might seem OOC so i appologize in advance. Short story 4 chapters at most. Enjoy everyone! Completed story!
1. Accidental murderer

It was an accident really. I hadn't meant any harm by it. It was just supposed to be a harmless little prank and that was it. But it backfired so badly on me. That poor old man was scared literally to death by me. And all I did was make a clown pop up out of one his plants. Purely accidental. I swear. It wasn't even mean for him in the first place. It was meant for my mother's landlady Mrs. Nevels. Can't stand that woman. Always bickering about one thing or another. I absolutely hate it! She never has a single nice thing to say. It's always it's a bad day for her year round. Now don't get me

Wrong I get it. Life is hard.

But don't be dragging others in the dirt with you. I've had my fair share of bad days but that doesn't give me the right to make others' days worse by any means. Now about the old man I accidentally killed. His name was Mr. Joseph Smith. Really super nice and rather gentlemanly like. He'd hold the door open for ladies, tell them they looked lovely and even on some occasions by their flowers for them.. To you he probably sounds like a creep ,but he was honestly more like everyone's grandfather. And I felt utterly guilty for accidentally killing the poor old geezer. But what's done is done and I can't exactly Go back to fix it.

He just laid there so unmoving and I could feel the color drain from my face. I very hestently walked over and poked at him with my foot to see if maybe he was still alive. His body jolted and then he made a mess under himself. I slowly turned him over to face me with my eyes clenched shut.

I didn't hear him talking so I took a peek at him and covered my mouth to not scream. His eyes were wide open and staring at me.

The last thing he saw was that clown pop up.

I didn't even know what to do at all. I couldn't call anyone because it'd be led to me and I'd be in more trouble than needed right now.

Plus my landlady would do just about anything to get me locked up and this would be her chance.

Groaning I looked back to my car and then to him. I had no choice. I tried to lift him up but there was no way I could deadlift him that far.

So I had to drop him and boy did he make the loudest crashing sound ever. Probably had to do with the fact it was just us out here for the time Being. I slowly pulled him along seeing his skin scrape against the gravel and give him quite the nasty rash. I finally got to my car and hauled him inside my trunk. Course that wasn't the smartest thing for me to do. If I get pulled over, I'm so screwed.

No way I'd be able to talk my way out of it. I slammed the trunk down making sure it locked and stuck. I didn't need it to pop open and someone call the cops on me. I looked back and groaned rubbing my face. I had left a blood trail on the way to my car. Sighing I kicked the gravel around with my shoes in the hopes that would help. But even I knew all it'd take is one spec of blood and I was done for.

I returned to my car after making dam sure to clean up all I could a started it. I turned on the radio to ease my guilty conscience. Before long I was cruising back to my place. Yes I know it's stupid to go to your own with a dead body in your trunk ,but it's not like I had other places to even be. I was maybe ten blocks away when I got stuck behind a rather slow moving car , in a no passing zone might I add. So it was rather frustrating.

I tried to get around them several times without any luck at all. I hit my head on my horn several times in pure frustration. As soon as a passing zone cane up this little ass of a car sped up so I still couldn't pass them. I screamed loudly and tugged at my hair some. I dam near swerved off the road and into a ditch by tugging at my Hair.

I really just wanted to get home already...was that too much to ask? I heard sirens suddenly and quickly glanced over. Cop car after cop car was zooming by in the opposite lane. I crouched down some rubbing my face at the stop Light. I was In luck I could turn down the street next to me and take the longish way back to my apartment. I happily sped along , But I got caught up in it that I didn't hear the siren behind me.

Today just isn't my day.


	2. Can this get much worse?

"Son you have any idea how fast you were going in a school zone might I add?" The Officer asked me his arms folded over. "No sir." I said softly feeling my stomach knot up. "Mmhmm...sure you didn't. I'm going to need your license." He said making me nod my head. "Here." I said handing it over and watched him scan it through his stupid device. I could have very easily sped off. But what good would that do me? It'd arise more suspicion to me that definitely wasn't needed.

"Alright Son I'm going to let you off with a warning beings this is your first offense." The Officer told me seriously Enough. "Thank You Officer. Am I free to go now?" I asked and he nodded. I turned my car turn single on and he stopped me. "Yes Officer?" I asked noticing he was looking at my trunk. I felt Cold sweat go down my back. "You aware your left blinker is out?"

"No officer." I said as he walked back to his car. "I'm afraid that's a ticket. See to it, that you get it fixed." He said lowly to me as he wrote my ticket up. "Will do." I said nervously slowly peeling out of the place. The officer followed me until I pulled into my apartment lot and then he sped off. Now for the real challenge to start. Getting mr. smith's body out of my car. Without being seen.

I ducked down some seeing my landlady's car parked next to mine. She was talking to someone on the phone and sounded rather upset. I slid further down as I heard her car door open. I looked over through my window and saw she was standing right there, so I had to fake looking for something on my floor and pretend to find it. "Late night again?" She asked noisily. She pointed her nose up at me as she always did. "Not that long of a night. Got pulled over is all."

"Oh you're trouble. I want you and that mother of yours out of here. Now. P…" she began and I cut her off. "Please it was just because I speed a little to get home."

"Speeding!" She said gasping in shock. "It's my first offense don't take it so heavily." Okay so that was a lie but she didn't need to know that.

"Mhmmm...anymore and I'll be forced to give you the boot understood."

She scoffed some at me before she clacked away on her very much annoying high heels. It was a wonder she could even walk in them given they didn't exactly support her frame. I'm not saying she's fat, just don't wear high heels if you walk in them like a newborn giraffe. I waited a few more minutes before springing to action. I carefully wrapped up Mr. smith with the heavy blanket I kept in my trunk just Incase I ever needed it.

That's the easy part. The hard part, will be dragging him into my apartment. I slowly dragged him along the sidewalk and then up the first flight of stairs leading to my apartment room. My fingers slipped some and mr. smith went tumbling down, unwrapping himself as he went. I ran down to fetch him and quickly rewrapped him , tighter than I had. I finally Got to the apartment door and slammed it open dragging mr. smith's dead body in with me. I felt utterly terrible for what I'd done. But again what's done is done and there's no going back.

I slumped down against the wall. I was lucky my mom was oughta of town for a bit so there was that.

I wasn't too sure what to do now. There was no way I'd be able to keep him here. The smell would attract rodents.

Not only that, it'd give the landlady a legitimate reason to hate me.

Mumbling to myself I slowly Got up still pondering what to do with his body.

I heard a loud banging on my door and panicked. I quickly dragged Mr. Smith's body and shoved him under my bed where other odds and ends were.

"Just a second!" I called out to whomever it was and then rushed to answer the door. "Oh hello..I'm Marshal smith." The guy said nervously. "Hello may I help you?"

He swallowed some nervously shaking.

I thought he was going to get sick on my

Welcome mat. "Uh yeah see my grandfather hasn't exactly shown up Home and it's not like him to stay out this late. You wouldn't know where he is..would you?" He asked so sadly looking at me with puppy dog eyes. "Oh no I'm sorry. But I do hope you find him." I said watching him leave. What?! It's not like I could have said, oh yeah he's in hear dead as a doorknob under my bed, cuz I wanted to prank my landlady and wound up killing your grandfather by accident.

That would not have gone over well. I slowly shut the door behind marshal and turned to my bed. There was no way I'd be able to keep him there for very long. Maybe overnight wouldn't be terrible I suppose. I can wake up nice and early to dump his body somewhere. I slowly made my way to my

Shower absolutely paranoid someone would come knocking on my door again.

I scrubbed up hopped out and quickly Got dressed for bed. I laid down and curled into my pillow some. Nice and early tomorrow I'd come up with a plan on just where I could take Mr. smith. I closed my eyes then snapped them open. There was no way I'd be sleeping in the same room as a dead body. I ended up my couch and wound up watching some cartoons for a bit.


	3. F&k me!

I slowly woke up to the sun peeking through my window. I yawned some closing my eyes again and pulled the sheet over my head. Then my eyes snapped open. The sun was out! I quickly grabbed my phone and groaned loudly. I thought I chose the right alarm, but turns out I hit the eight am alarm instead of the four am alarm. Great….. I got up running my hands through my hair thinking. Just how was i supposed to get him out of my apartment now? I got lucky last night beings no one was awake but, now I had to get him past not only my landlady but all of my neighbors.

I had to think of something!

I made my way to my room and slammed the door open.

I about gagged at the smell. I backed out, got my febreeze and showered everything in my room with it. Hey it says it masks the worst of orders.

I tugged Mr. smith's body out gently and his ear fell off into my hand. I screamed dropping and quickly wiped my hand off onto my pj bottoms. "I made a face of pure discus. "Okay...okay… I just need to get you out of here. Without you losing any more limbs." I said using my foot to pick up his ear and then place it on him. "Okay...I can do this. I can do this." I told myself taking in a deep breath and releasing it.

I slowly tugged at his arm and could hear a popping sound.

I quickly dropped his arm and ran my fingers in my hair.

At this rate he'll end up pieces. Wait a minute….pieces…

That's how i can sneak him out! In pieces!

"Gah! No I can't do that! I'll be caught if i do!" I said aloud.

I heard a pounding on my door and felt an instant dread. "What...now…" i said softly nudging Mr. smith's body under my bed once more.

"Hello I'm detective Barabe." A man said in my doorway tipping his hat at me. "Pleasure, what can i do for you detective?" I asked him trying to keep my voice from shaking. "I'm investigating the disappearance of one Mr. Smith the plant shop owner." he said looking past me into my apartment.

"Yes his grandson came by the other day asking if I'd seen him."

Detective Barabe nodded his head some jotting that down.

"What was your relation to the missing man?" he asked curiously enough.

Oh I hardly knew him. I killed him on accident. He's under my bed, wanna see? "Son?" he asked again slowly to get my attention. "Huh oh sorry..

"It's quite fine, now what was your relation to the missing man?" Detective Barabe asked me again. "I just knew him as the plant shop owner. He didn't have many enemies at all." I said honestly. "Do you know of anyone who'd want to get rid of him at all?" he asked and I inwardly screamed. "Yeah...ask his family. There was a rumor he had quite a good life insurance policy." i said lying through my teeth. SO i lied! At least this would get him away from me for now. I just needed to get rid of Mr. Smith's body and then maybe move? No can't do that. "Do you mind if i take a look around?" He asked making me face pale. "No….no...go right ahead." I said stepping out of the way.

He bee lined for my room and I followed him. He looked around my room and then to me. "Well you're in the clear for now miss. But i will be back tonight." he said seriously heading off. I felt my heart explode in my chest.

I glanced out the window to see if he was still there and yep he was.

He was leaning against his car smoking casually.

My landlady was outside too and made a beeline for him. No doubt to scold him for smoking and such. I almost felt sorry for the guy.

From the way his face looked now, you could tell my landlady was giving him a lecture.

Then he left making me sigh in relief.

I grabbed a garbage bag, and some old clothing of mine, hoping that would help disguise Mr. smith's body some. I tugged him out from my bed and swallowed hard in order to keep the bile down. I shoved most of him into a bag , which wasn't easy! I had to stand him up and have him lean against me, whilst I dropped the bag over him and nudge his body into it. Once down, I went to put my old clothes with him and then stopped. What was I thinking?! Using my old clothes to hide his body! I'll be sent to jail instantly! Fantastic! He was in the garbage bag and now I had to hide him in stuff and then get the garbage outside somehow.

Okay...I can do this. I dragged the bag and tried to lift it up, falling back in doing so. "Great…" I mumbled softly. I dragged the stupid bag down to my kitchen and just left it by my trash bin. There was a pounding knock on my door again and I knew it was My landlady Just from the sound. "Yes mame?" I asked opening the door. "You're late for your rent!" "It's not due until thursday." I said making her grin at me. "Today is friday dear…" She said smiling grimly at me.

"Right...sorry...how much do I owe you for being late in payment?" I asked letting her inside. She looked at the Garbage by my door. "Getting rid of some old halloween decoration?" she asked going to open the bag up. I rushed over grabbing her hand. "Yes. and I'd appreciate you not going through my trash." I said making her smile at me some. "Course…" she said dropping her hands some. "You owe me two hundred this month. As for the lateness. Another hundred." she said holding her hand out. "Fine. Here. Now will you please leave? I'd like to get my trash to my car and then take a shower." I said making her cock an eyebrow. "We have dumpsters here you know." "I'm well aware, but this is a halloween decoration and i'm giving it to a relative of mine out of state. Now please leave." I said shoving her out the door and locking it. She grumbled some about and eventually left for her apartment room.

I hopped into my shower and then looked at the garbage bag. I dragged it to my car and hoisted it into my back seat. No way I was going to get him back into my trunk with his limbs falling apart on me. I got into my car and turned the radio on. Which didn't help ease my nerves at all. "Missing man Mr. smith vanished…" The first station said.

"We have marshall smith here…" The next station I was on said making me flip to yet another station. "Breaking news! Local plant shop owner m…" was all I let the final station say before i clicked my radio off. "Okay so no radio for a bit. This won't be too terrible." I said driving onto the highway.

About twenty minutes later, I regret ever having said that. I was blocked in by not one but three semi trucks all around me going fast and slow enough so I couldn't pass them. I just couldn't seem to catch a break at all.

A road trip that should have taken only three hours at best, was now taking well over five hours, thanks to the traffic. I honestly should have left a lot sooner than I did. But I was more worried about getting Mr. Smith's body into my car unseen and then some.

I finally managed to get out of state and pulled my car off the side of the road. I had to wait a bit until there was no traffic on the road, which wasn't easy. The highways here are like new york city, they never sleep.

Then i had my chance, It was two am and no traffic around at all.

I dragged the garbage back out past the highway and into a ditch.

I had no shovel with me to bury him, but i could at least lay him down peacefully.

I did just that , making sure to remove the garbage bag from his body. "I'm sorry…" I said gently to him heading back to my car.

I turned my radio back on hoping they were done with the whole Mr. smith disappearance. I made my way back home rather slowly. I wasn't in much rush plus I didn't exactly have anything to eat today. I stopped in a simple rest stop to pick up some grub and maybe use the restroom while I was there. "Hello welcome to sweeties what can I get you?" The waitress asked me clacking the gum in her mouth. "Just a coffee and some pretzel bites is all." I said gently to her.

"Cream and sugar?" She asked and I shook my head no. "Fine that'll be right out." She said lowly.

"Breaking news! The body of one Mr. smith has been found!" The announcer said. A creepy silence enveloped the room as everyone , including me watched the tv.

"He has been found near the highway not too far from where he's from." The reporter said.

He paused some to fix his stack of papers.

"Which makes this local reporter wonder, just who killed him and why did they dump him in a ditch? We will update you with more of this story as it comes our way. Now back to your regularly scheduled program." The tv flipped back to some soccer match and I felt all the color drain from me. "Here's your coffee and pretzel bites." The waitress said pouring me my coffee and about making me jump. "Will that be all?" She asked cocking an eyebrow. "Yes." I said making her nod. "Well here's the check and take your time." She said making me nod. It took a bit too calm down enough to be able to even drink my stupid coffee. I finished up quickly and headed out to my car. I sped quite a bit and I was lucky I wasn't pulled over at all. I rushed inside and slammed the door shut behind me.

It was over.

The body wasn't in my apartment so I was good.

I sat back on my couch turning the tv on. "We have more on the smith homicide case. We have one detective barbare with us. Now detective what can you tell us about this case?" The reporter asked aloud. "We have a few leads and hope to apprehend the subject soon." Detective barbare said simply. "Fuck me….." I mumbled rubbing at my temples some and leaning back into my couch.

I honestly just want to hide at this point.

"I'm sure everyone is wondering, is Mr. smith a one time kill." The reporter asked seriously.

"No, they plan on doing it again sometime next week. How's that sound to you?"

"We aren't sure." Detective barbare said.

"So we advice everyone to be careful heading out of town." He Warned. "It's not gonna happen again….sheesh...give me a break."

I flipped my tv off hoping that'd be the end of it.

Ha! Life always finds a way to screw me over.


	4. Ha funny

I woke up to someone pounding on my door around three am. I groaned some covering my ear with my pillow hoping they'd just go away, but the knocking got even louder. "Alright already! I'm coming! I'm coming!" I snapped getting out of bed. My foot caught on my sheets and down I went. I just laid there groaning. I slowly got up and walked my way to my door. I opened it tiredly and blinked some. "Son...detective Barbare we need you to come to station with us." He said making me groan some. "Okay…." I said yawning some more. I honestly Just wanted to get back to sleep.

"Right this way." detective Barbare said.

I followed him out and got into his car.

"We just need to ask you some questions is all."

"It's fine detective. Just a bit early don't cha think. I'm hardly awake right now." I said yawning.

"It is But the sooner we do this the sooner we can clear your name." He said seriously.

"Okay…." I said closing my eyes some.

"Nice car you have by the way." He said casually.

"It was my father's hand me down if you will."

"One of Your tires wouldn't happen to be low or even a spare would it?" He asked making me inwardly scream.

"Not that I know of detective." I said lying through my teeth.

He gave me a look of disbelief as we pulled into the parking lot.

"We want you to take a lie detector test. Simple. And then you can go home and sleep."

I felt my stomach knot on me.

Lie detector…..test…..

I'm doomed! "Right this way." Detective Barbare told me leading me down a massive hallway and then into an interrogation room. The machine was hooked up to me and I was doing everything in my power to calm down.

My heart was racing a mile a minute.

And I'm sure the machine could pick that up.

"Alright. Did you know Mr. smith?" "Yes." I said calmly. "Where you aware of his disappearance before it was shown on the news?" "Yes."

"Did marshal come to your door to ask you if you'd seen his grandfather?" "Yes." "Alright Final question...Do you know who killed Mr. smith." The detective asked and I felt my face pale. "No." I said feeling my palms sweat. The machine was taken off of me slowly. "We will contact you again if we need to." Detective Barbare said with a grin smile. He led me back to his car and then drove me on home. I felt nervous beings he kept looking at me, mumbling something and then shaking his head.

I got out of his car slowly and walked up to my apartment. I shut my door and then just leaned against it, my hands in my hair some. "Oh….what am I going to do now?" I asked softly closing my eyes and hiding my face into my knees. "What am I going to do now…." I mumbled softly. At this point I had three options. Option one kill myself and avoid punishment. Which I'm not doing… option two change my identity. We are talking name, accent, look, eye color, and hair color. It isn't a terrible idea to do. Option three would be, just confess and hope I don't get a heavy charge for any of this.

I was honestly leaning towards option two.

I mean sure option three would be the best.

But I really don't want to go to jail for something that was purely accidental. Call me selfish , I could care less at this point.

I groaned some hearing a knock on the door.

"Oh Hello Again Marshall." I said gently to him and he didn't say a word to me.

"Hey...was there something you wanted to talk to me about?" I asked feeling rather uneasy with him just standing there. He opened his hand and it was a cut out piece of a blow up clown doll. "I found this in one of my grandfather's pots. He hated clowns. One of his fears. I just don't get why he'd have this." Marshall said looking at me expecting me to know the answers. "Maybe it got put there by mistake." I said gently to him. "Would you like me to keep a hold of it? The clown piece that is." I said trying to grab the piece from his hands. "No no I'll keep it. I should give this to detective Barbare."

"You don't have to do that. I could do it for you. " I said quickly and then gently. "You know what happened to my grandfather don't you! Don't you!" He screamed grabbing me by my shirt and shoving me back against the door hard. "Don't you!" He screamed again pulling me from the door and hitting me back against it hard. "Marshall please…" I said trying to shove him away from me. "You know what really happened! Tell me!" Marshal said lowly. Then he seemed to suddenly calm down and let me go. "Don't I deserve to know what really happened to my grandfather? Don't I? I'm his grandson and we were so close. He raised me. Don't I deserve to know what happened?"

I bit my lip nervously and sighed heavily. "Yes you do. But marshal the truth isn't what you want to hear. You want me to tell you that a monster killed your grandfather in cold blood. But the thing is. He wasn't killed on purpose and that's all I'll tell you. Now please leave." I said motioning to my door. "Wasn't killed on purpose?" He asked confused.

"Yep now get out!" I said shoving him.

"Wait! What do you mean by…"

I felt a little bad for slamming the door in his face but, what choice did I have.

I locked the door rubbing my temples some. "Okay I just need to stay calm and focused. That's it. This will all blow over soon enough. Some tv might due me some good right now. Yeah tv sounds perfect."

I flopped on my couch and turned my tv on and of course there was news bulletin on Mr. Smith.

"We have more on the Mr. smith case. On the phone with us now is Marshall. Now Marshall you believe you might know who killed your grandfather is this true?" The reporter asked aloud. "Yeah I have a hunch but I'm not sure."

I swallowed hard feeling my stomach drop. "Could you give our audience a name perhaps?" The reporter asked tapping his fingers on the desk impatiently. "No. no. I can't do that to her." Marshall said seriously and I smiled relieved. "But what I will say is I urge her to go to the police. Tell detective Barbara the truth. So not only my grandfather can have closure but so I can and she can as well. You can only run so far before you reach the finish line." Marshall said sincerely.

Maybe he was right. Maybe I should tell the truth. Then again, maybe not.

I flicked the tv off and just laid there face first in the couch cushions. I lazily got up hearing yet more knocking on my door. It's a wonder my landlady hasn't complained about it yet. "Hello?" I asked rubbing at my eyes some. I didn't even get a chance to react as I was turned ,cuffed and dragged to detective Barbare's car.

All the while he's telling me I have the right to remain silent and how if I don't have an attorney one will be provided for me. The whole time I'm thinking with what money? I mean this guy has seen where I live. It's decent but not nice. I was shoved in the car ,the door was slammed shut on me and off we went.

"I'd like an attorney." I said looking out the window. Before I know it, I'm in an interrogation room, and next to me is some attorney the state has so kindly given me. It's just us in here but, that doesn't make me feel much better.

"So then son, care to explain what's happened?" My attorney says smiling nice enough. "Eh...It's kinda a funny story." I said honestly. "Really now?" He says slight confused. "Trust me it is." "Well start talking then. I can't help you, if I don't have a clue what's happened." "Fine. Fine. But I did warn you." I say seriously resting my arms on the small table In here.


End file.
